Why Bother?

159What can one say that is of any significance after pouring energy into teaching 145 children in a single day? Shopping for dinner, getting food on the table and the dishes cleaned? Exhaustion soon follows. How does one come up with energy and creativity enough to write words filled with passion?

I lean into my long dead compatriots – the truth tellers; I figuratively ‘lean’ with a deep longing to understand all they suffered. They ultimately communicate to me through their typewriters and big bottles of scotch. In fact, they – my immortal mentors inspire me through their long since dead time travel, their art and finely crafted skill is nothing without the courage and tenacity to speak. Speak when you are weary, speak when you are afraid, and write for all of mankind.

Solzhenitzen cited this willingness to step aside whether weary or uninspired in his Nobel Prize address. “…a work of art bears within itself its own verification: conceptions which are devised or stretched do not stand being portrayed in images, they all come crashing down, appear sickly and pale, convince no one. But the those works of art which have scooped up the truth and presented it to us as a living force- they take hold of us, compel us and nobody ever, not even in ages to come, will appear to refute them.”

I treasure my reticence at times – the humility leads me to allow others to cook or paint or to be more prolific than I am. I can rest in another’s beauty, for a moment.

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