I can’t open the door.

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There was a time long ago when I could go inside this cute little house and visit. The neighbors would invite me to come over anytime for a morning cup of coffee and chit chat. Their doors were always open. Then one very sad day he passed away. Soon she announced she was moving back to New York to be with her kids. From that time on, those doors were officially closed. Later I watched as a big piece of equipment remove the house within hours, piece by piece. The woman living there told me she felt stuck and didn’t know what to do, she desperately wanted to leave. She was in so much pain from all of the memories yet she didn’t know what to do.

Have you ever felt stuck in a situation or location and didn’t know how to get out? As a small child, when I tried to open a heavy door to go outside, I didn’t have enough strength to pull it open. When someone stronger came by and opened it with ease I slid in right behind them. As I grew older I developed more muscles and began opening many doors. Some I walked through brought forth amazing experiences, others were incredible nightmares.

Just because we can open a door does not mean we should go through it. Being a female, I love it when a gentleman is present and graciously opens a door for me to safely pass through. Although I am free to enter, I am also the one responsible to be alert and determine if it is a wise. Shall I move forward or quickly back track and remove myself from the area?

Just as the example above addresses walking through physical doors, there are also emotional doorways we need to be aware of. Shall we throw caution to the wind and continue to walk through them even if we get red signals to stop? When a man or woman invites someone into their lives, and truly conducts themselves as a gentleman or lady; how do we know if they are arousing desire or expectation for something unattainable or even mockingly out of reach, or into their inner sanctuary?

It may appear they are genuine and sincere. But what happens when they get tired of the others company? What if they decide they preferred to be alone? Where do we turn when we recognize the door of acceptance is no longer being held wide open, but instead is getting slammed shut? We no longer have the freedom to enter their sanctuary any time we desire.

When this happens there is pain that goes beyond the ability to describe. When rejected some discover their pain surmount that of utter devastation; their emotions shredded, their heart broken. What do we do when someone who once lovingly embraced our presence, no longer desires to share even one moment of their time with us? The door has been closed and their heart appears to be permanently sealed shut.
These are the times when we need others to support us and remind us life is good even if we are going through a very painful season. Words can do no justice to describe the pain and sorrow we endure at times in life. Each relationship, circumstance and individual is unique, therefore creating different scenarios. Yet we all can understand, no matter what words we use to describe our own situation causing the relationship to end, the results are the same, a broken heart.

When this occurs we can have a tendency to want to withdraw or isolate. Others may find themselves chasing after others to try to fill a void. Many make the mistake of getting involved with another too early, without giving them time to reflect and heal.

It is important to remember we do not want to be afraid to open a new door (it may seem too heavy), nor do we want to be afraid to experience new adventures because of the things of the past. These are times in life when we may need to re-frame our thinking and receive help to have our heart mended. Although it takes time to heal, in doing so we may once again begin to enjoy life to its fullest. We live in a beautiful world with so many opportunities we can share with others.

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