Feb 06

Sharing Space


These amazing trees have grown together as they persevered the elements of time. Planted long ago, it was determined they would share their space as they began to reach for the sky. Their roots became deeply meshed and intermingled. They quickly spread throughout the soil looking for nourishment and water. As time passed, each stood alone, triumph over all the challenges of wind and storms. Basking in sunshine, they celebrate the life they were created to become.

We also may have others in our life that are planted next to us and share our space. Together, our roots continue to grow deeper as we seek nourishment for our body and soul. Although we are very unique and individual beings, just as each of these trees represent, we also are intermingled in the hearts and minds of others. Together we too may blossom, basking in the warmth of the sun, while enjoying the beauty of life all around us.

May 27

What Stands Between You and Your Dreams?

20160124_134303What Does This Mean, Protection or Freedom?

There will never be another now…I will make the most of today.

There will never be another me…I’ll make the most of myself.  (Author unknown)

A sobering thought comes with the knowledge that there is no one else who can actually do this for you. Is it true we have to wait for the perfect time before we can experience our dreams? It is easy to fall into a pattern of faulty thinking that rob us of the ability to enjoy life. It is called the, “If – Then” thinking. If I lose twenty pounds then I can go buy myself new clothes. If I accomplish this task, then I can celebrate that… If I get a new job, then I will be happy. If I get married, then I’ll be fulfilled. If I get a divorce, then I can be free. The word ‘If’ always qualifies the ‘then’, therefore the then is never allowed to come into the now.

That is not to say we should not set goals and look forward to the rewards of fulfilling them. Yet if we embrace the “If – then thinking”, knowingly or unknowingly, we are hindering our ability to live and enjoy life where we are in the present, missing our unique and individual processing called life.

Looking at the fence above, we can see it is between the people on the bluff and the ocean below, knowing the fence was put there for our protection. This visual serves as a reminder. There also may be many physical or mental barriers (fences/walls) for protection, set up between us and our dreams. Are we sabotaging our ability to fulfill our passion and destiny? Just as the fence was put up to protect us from harm, have we put up our own emotional de-fences to protect our heart from harm?

It us good to know we can be free. Are we willing to climb over the fence to get to freedom? Are we willing to go around the fence if we have to so we can find another way to fulfill our passion? These are the questions each of us will have to answer at the end of the day. Are we ready to do so? Liberty awaits.

Aug 11

Can we accept ourselves for who we are?

SPRING 08 #2 272Being vulnerable and getting alterations for a special occasions in life is important at times. When we look in a mirror we will see things from a certain point of view. Yet on a normal day to day basis, how do we view our self? How do others view us? What if our stomach is poochy, thighs too wide, and our arms are flabby? Do we actually care one way or the other? I realize as I have matured I am not as concerned about what others think. What if I need to go out in public without make-up, or if I am not dressed a certain way, does it matter? Of course I realize I need to dress respectfully and appropriately while working in my professional field.

The way we look or dress is not the sum total of our value; after all, we know we are not to judge a book by its cover. Yet appearances can and do have an influence on our opinions. We also know the true value of one cannot be seen on the outward appearance. How does our personal appearance affect our own  opinion? Do we judge ourselves harshly or pridefully as we look in the mirror? In truth, how many people can actually accept who they are as they appear right now?”

When I was a baby I didn’t think about how other babies looked or what they were wearing. On a hot summer day both male and female babies were only wearing diapers. It was not until I grew older and entered grade school that my perspective was changed dramatically. Sometime during that process there seemed to be an unspoken rule that we were all supposed to wear certain clothing, style our hair a particular way, and only wear shoes that were a distinct brand. If we were not fortunate enough to be able to conform or perform, or if we didn’t have finances to purchase the latest fashions, we were considered outcasts.

Those were painful days for many as they attempted to be educated; not only in the academic world of reading, writing and arithmetic, but also in the school of hard knocks. All of those negative experiences had a powerful influence on our personal point of view and self-esteem, knowingly or unknowingly.

We are all created to be unique, individual and a ‘One of a kind master piece’. Human beings are amazingly built with the ability to grow, adapt, and increase their knowledge in many areas of life, all while developing from childhood into adults. As we pass through many stages of development it is incredible to see skills and talents begin to manifest.

When we go through this process we may be tempted to compare ourselves with those around us. Are we doing well? Are we keeping up with the status quo? What if we couldn’t cut it and didn’t get that coveted A in our classwork? Even when we work really hard and did our best, what if it is not good enough? Does it really matter, does anyone care?

How many times are we frustrated, angry or fearful, thinking we must be like, do like, or have something like someone else? Is it time that we accept ourselves as we are right now? As we go to the heart of the matter in many areas of our life, we may find we are unhappy because we think we should be different.

Are we ready to embrace and accept who we are by giving ourselves grace? We know we all have room for improvement. We all have the opportunity to grow and ameliorate our lives. We can make better choices that will help provide the kind of quality of life we desire in our future. Can we accept ourselves now as we travel along this journey? We are all moving and changing on a daily basis. It is good to know with change comes transition. This is a continual part of life in each of our unique and individual paths along the way.

Jul 29

Your value will never decrease

As the lone pink flower stands out amongst the others, how much more is it valued?

As the lone pink flower stands out amongst the others, how much more is it valued?

“Your value does not decrease based on someone’s inability to see your worth”


This statement is amazingly simple and powerfully true. Are we willing, or able to embrace it?

What is our value? What does the word value mean? Here are a few definitions: Having worth or merit; of great significance or value; being honorable or admirable; having incalculable monetary, intellectual or spiritual worth.

Who determines what is valuable and what is not? Is it our mother, our father, our significant other, peers, co-workers, friends, neighbors, what about the mailman? Does it really matter in the scheme of things what others think or how they value our worth? Perhaps it does, or perhaps not.

Our number one basic need centers around our survival. Our second basic need is love and belonging. While our mother is caring for us it is important she loves and values our existence. In my profession, I recognize not all mothers have a strong instinct to protect and care for their off spring. Many prefer to dispose of, or neglect their babies.

Many do not have a sound mind, others may choose to put their own needs before the child. Therefore, many grow up with low self-esteem from neglect and abuse and cannot comprehend that they are valuable in any way.

It is good news when we can take to heart the reality our value does not depend on or decrease due to someone else’s inability to see our worth. For many, the pain of abuse and rejection over many years has created tremendous emotional scars.

As a heart mender specialist I have seen many lives transformed and relationships healed as those who were hurting came to understand that their value is never in question. We are all created with amazing abilities to love and learn and share life together as we journey together in this adventure we call life. May we all remind each other of the fact life is good and we appreciate the privilege to be able to share it moment by moment.

Jul 25

Now what?


Every day we hear another story, it is usually about Brenda LOGO 5-23-15  jpgsomething tragic or negative in one way or the other. What can we do to help create another story? How can we contribute to this mass body of information and communication in a way that will make a positive difference?

We all need to believe in ourselves, even if no one else does. To do so, let’s embrace our authentic voice that desires to be expressed in some creative format. There are many who are great story tellers and must write for others to enjoy their thoughts. Some people love to write music lyrics so that they can touch the heart and soul of man.

What burns within our soul? Do we have any personal passion left? What are the gifts and talents we possess? Do they lie hidden or buried under the cares of the world? With the negative media streaming continual bad news it is difficult to know what is the truth?

If we choose to look, we can see the beauty of color, the variety of life, and the amazing creations that surround us day by day. We actually can celebrate life with appreciation for all the good things. We are responsible for our input as well as output in life.

Let us begin making a positive difference in the world we live in. As we make good choices and practice communicating with others, sharing positive views of life, we can plant seeds of life, love, and hope in the hearts of others.

When we hear the question, “Now What”?, let it be because people are hearing about the difference we are making for this hurting negative world.

Jul 23

Finding your place

sunrise siloutte 6-12-15

Where do I belong? Who do I think I am ? How many times have we asked ourselves these seemingly simple questions? Are they really simple? How does someone actually answer these? What do they mean?

For example: Do you feel like you belong in the physical place where you are currently lodging? When asking these questions, one must decide if they are referring to external or internal living?

Does the word ‘belong’ relate to a geographical location, group, or class setting? Is this question being asked to seek answers to address our need to belong from within?

The next question may be the internal quest we have regarding our purpose in life, our calling, our destiny.

There are many questions in life that may be answered by others concerning our identity. Only we can know the true meaning as where we really belong and who we are.

It is amazing experience when we accept the fact that no one else may answer these questions for us, even if they think they can.

When we recognize that fact, we will accept the responsibility and freedom to answer these questions for ourselves, with or without others permission and/or approval.

It is my calling, for those requesting my assistance, to help them to find their own unique and authentic voice. To help them embrace their identity, pursue their passion, and openly declare who they truly are.

As they receive their own revelations, recognize where they belong and what is their passion and true identity, a powerful joy and strength begins to build deep within their soul.The truth sets them free to be all they were created to be.

Lastly, I become their favorite cheer leader, encouraging them from the sidelines as they run their race. With a new boldness, powerful self-confidence, and a spring in their step, they walk forward into their future with clear insight and bright expectations.